update....

Thank you for all your kind comments/emails/phone calls/visits/etc. It's a really hard time but I feel so blessed to have such great family and friends to take care of us. Rob has had to be out of town 2 days out of the last week and that's been hard but everyone is helping take good care of me and of Robby. It's hard for Robby to see mommy sad and it's hard for him to spend the day away from me but I know he's having fun with his cousins and friends.

So everything is going ok - warning this might be a little too much info for some so skip this part if you don't want the details - I was scheduled to go to the hospital Monday morning at 6:15 am for a d&c. Sunday night it looked like I was starting to make some progress on my own and by 5:30 the next morning I decided to cancel the d&c and stay home and see what would happen from there. Monday was really hard, lots of pain and I think that I passed most everything that day. It's all slowed down considerably so it feels just like a really bad period. Sorry if that's tmi I'm trying to not go too into detail believe it or not. I will go to the doctor on Thursday to check my hcg levels (blood test) and then they'll do that again next week to make sure it goes all the way down, that's how they'll know if it all came out on it's own or if they still need to do a d&c. So please pray that it will work on it's own. I am grateful to be able to do it naturally and avoid the surgery and hope we'll continue to avoid it.

I just have to say I had no idea how physically painful a miscarriage would be. Emotionally, of course. But I didn't really consider everything your body had to go through. It is awful. And I had prescription drugs. I don't know what I would've done without Lindsay there babysitting me... If you ever have to go through this make sure you have someone with you at all times! Thank you, Becca, for making sure I did that because I did not know what to expect...

Monday Becca (my sister in law) had him all day (we put him to bed there Sunday night) and she had told him that mommy was sleeping/resting so when Rob went to pick him up he asked him if he wanted to go see Mommy and he said, "no, mommy seeping!" So that's what I keep telling him when someone comes to pick him up to play - mommy needs to stay here and sleep and then you'll come back. The other thing he said to me when he was leaving one day - he was hugging me and said, "be right back, mom." That's what I always say to him when I'm leaving him somewhere... it was really sweet. He is such a sweet boy and I'm glad I have him.

Tonight Rob is out of town and I just can NOT fall asleep! And I am exhausted. Sometimes I can't sleep when my mind is full so I thought this would be a good chance to give you all an update.

It does help to know so many people have gone through this, including 2 of my own sisters, several friends, and all the other experiences I've heard.... thank you everyone who has shared your experience with me. I'm grateful for everyone who's comfortable enough talking about this - it makes me feel comforted and also it makes me feel more comfortable about the fact that I do want to talk about it/share it with others. I feel bad that it is kind of a taboo subject in our society and I understand, now more than ever, that it is painful to talk about, but I have also been helped by hearing your stories and being able to discuss mine.

Love you all and thanks again for your prayers and kind words....

Sydney

love at first sight....

we LOVE you SYDNEY!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I was really looking forward to posting some exciting news Tuesday afternoon after my doctor's appointment. Unfortunately, now I have some sad news.

Many of you know that I was pregnant and now it looks like I'm having a miscarriage. I am about 10 1/2 weeks but baby stopped developing a few weeks ago and yet nothing has happened. I'm waiting a few days and if nothing still then I'll go ahead with a d&c probably.

I feel really grateful for so many of you sharing your miscarriage experiences with me. I know so many others who've been through this, it makes me feel not so alone. I know that going through this will help me help others in the future... I'm grateful for my family and friends and their support. I'm also so grateful to have little Robby. He doesn't understand why mommy is so sad and I know that's hard for him but I feel so lucky to have him and just hope he'll get a sibling sometime soon.

It was so hard to not post about being excited about being pregnant - I was going to wait till after my first appointment. And now I just feel like I need to share what's going on for it to seem more real. It feels like a bad dream right now....

I'll let you know how I'm doing....

Robby's new do

Robby's hair had been getting so scruffy! I had taken him to Cookie Cutters a couple of times and really liked it but just didn't want to spend the money on it right now. But it was getting so long....

So I decided to just do it myself. Tonight. Without Rob here to help. You'd think that with a mom whose a hairdresser, and little sister is too, I'd have inherited SOME skill.... no. I'm pretty sure Rob will have to go over the haircut later but oh well. It's shorter! Oh and it took me like 15 minutes to convince him to let me do it. He was scared of the clippers.... ah.... but doesn't he look cute? I always forget how much I like him with short hair.

Aquarium

Today we went to The Living Planet Aquarium in Sandy with Liv and Tara and kids! It was a lot of fun - the kids loved it....

.....except when it was time to leave. Robby and Sydney kept saying "no! Stay here!" But it's ok cause we got a membership! So we'll be back. Kind of funny - we paid $8 to get in ($8 for me and he was free) and then Tara pointed out that memberships were just $16 - so if we went twice it'd be paid for.... so they just let us put the $8 we paid today towards that and got the membership. That will be nice to have cause then you can just go for a short time and not feel like you wasted your money!

Oh and ps - there were a MILLION kids there. :( Boo to school field trip groups! No, they are fine but they were just pushing our small kiddos around and I was about to fight them. I'd love to go back at a less busy time.

Rach

Check out my little sister, Rachel.

Oh, and that's her dog, Daisy.

Tot School

I have to thank Aubrey and her post about snowy days because it was in the comments that I found the link to this Tot School site!

I have spent hours browsing that blog and all the blogs linked to it and getting so inspired! I have just been feeling like such a lazy mom lately! We've definitely spent too much time watching Blues Clues that's for sure. I am just so glad I found something to inspire me to get more creative with Robby. Really my main problem is I can not come up with ideas myself - so here I just found the jack pot of super easy great activities to do with my almost 2 year old!

Saturday I went to Ikea and Micheals to get a bunch of supplies. I had nothing. I had to buy GLUE! It was fun but also a little overwhelming. I just got some of the basics and we'll see how it goes from there.

My first fun activity - making this cute cardboard guitar I found here. Check that site out for more specific directions on how to make it.

First - draw the outline of a guitar on a piece of cardboard. I drew the outline and then let Robby color it however he wanted.

Then I cut out the guitar as well as a black circle for the middle. I also got some kid scissors and let Robby use them on other paper - I wish I had a picture of his face when I told him he was able to use the scissors! Priceless!

Then I poked holes in the top and bottom and threaded pipe cleaners through. I taped them down in the back. Oh, and I also totally cut my finger trying to poke one of the holes. So be careful.

And then have a little dance party! Ok so he didn't exactly *play* the guitar like you might expect but he did enjoy it.


Then later today we busted out the new easel we got at Ikea! Robby's first time really going crazy with chalk.

Next thing I want to try is one of these ISPY bottles!

DWTS - what the heck?

I have had on and off again interest in the show Dancing With the Stars. It's nowhere near as awesome or fun as So You Think You Can Dance but it's still a show about dancing....

Tonight I turned on the TV and saw DWTS was on, only like 15 min left, so I switched to it.... watched Denise Richards dance and then, what the heck, Melissa Rycroft from the BACHELOR? I guess Nancy O'Dell who was supposed to be Tony's partner got injured and had to withdraw so Melissa stepped in. She only had 2 days to learn her dance and I thought it was pretty dang good, especially for a first week dance. But MELISSA? Wow..... random. Um, and that's totally her picture from the Bachelor - yes?


Then I got online to try and figure out more details and noticed Ty Murray and his partner is CHELSIE HIGHTOWER!!!!!!! From SYTYCD! She was my favorite! She is from Orem. I don't think I've blogged about this but I've seen her at my gym a couple of times - the Gold's Gym on 8th North - and the first time I nearly fell over!!! Ahhh! I would've loved to say hi and tell her I thought she was great but it would be a little awkward to interrupt her work out! It was just neat to see her! She's tiny.

Soooo! Looks like I'll be adding DWTS to my DVR recordings!!

this kid is crazy and makes me laugh.... he just walked into the kitchen wearing this hat like, "hey, mom..." ahhh.....

Laptime Reunion

A few weeks ago I was at the Orem Library and happened to grab a newsletter and noticed they had a schedule of volunteers for Laptime. February 19th caught my eye - Zianna Whetten!! We got to know and love this amazing lady back in our Skyview days in the 191st ward where her husband was the bishop! Sister Whetten was so surprised to see us all at laptime and thrilled to know we came especially to see her - Lindsay even came from work in the middle of the day! It was a great little reunion. As Sister Whetten said, "it's candy for my heart."

And does anyone have her email address so I can send her this picture??